I’ve never really been a person who is fixated on the way I look. I never spend more than 5 minutes in front of the mirror getting ready each day – if at all – and I honestly have no idea where other women get that motivation from. Hell, even my partner spends more time doing his hair than I do.
The same goes for other areas of my appearance. I’m not really all that fussed in what I wear – as long as I am a) comfortable and b) feel good wearing it, then it’s all good – and as far as my physical appearance goes, well, everything I do for my body is for me, not to fit in or look “sexy” by social standards.
All that being said, looking at my legs in the shower today had me feeling quite sad.
My left knee has been swollen, to varying degrees, for 12 years making any type of “leg work” pretty much impossible. My right leg is going pretty well because it is basically my crutch if I need to lift my body weight for whatever reason, but my left leg is really struggling to hold form. I also have left over “hard” fluid in both my ankles, so this 50kg lady has cankles! Generally speaking, it means I have to be very careful I don’t walk the wrong way and if I’m doing exercise, well, you get the idea.
I know that I could do some water exercises, and there’s no excuse for laziness (but possibly for the fact that I can’t afford the admission to the pool every day), but I am someone whom loves to do a variety of activities with my legs. Running, jumping, skipping, dancing, all of my favourite past times. Me and water have never really made friends, even though I was bullied (in a nice way) into swimming the 200 metre relay in Primary School and did quite well if memory serves.
I just miss being able to move my body you know? and the effects of it are very much starting to become more than apparent. I have a whole bunch of fat and toxins building up under the skin, the area around my thighs is beginning to become loose and flabby, and certain muscles are becoming neglected and weak.
The worst part is I know that if I don’t put the effort in my body, it will only get worse. Age generally tends to degrade the body, not the other way around.
It also concerns me that the top half of my body is pretty thin and from the waist down I have some sort of fat storage situation going on. Everyone wants a banging body! I just want to get that freedom back.
I just want to move again! Frustrating to want the things we don’t seem to have, isn’t it? I mean, I also want to be a normal human being who, rather than get freaked out about planning a holiday to the tropical parts of Australia, would look forward to it with gusto. Who is scared of a holiday?
But hell, I’d settle with being about to go to an appointment by myself again.
Anyone have any good tips for exercising the lower region of the body at home for people who may have joint problems (keeping in mind that it is very painful to bend the joint)?