Humor · Love · Personal · Relationship

Waking In An Oven – The 4 am Story

We start today’s story at 4am. I woke in an oven; a very non-literal oven. I’ll fast-forward a couple of hours earlier, to when we were going to bed.

Partner (in bed): Did you hear that?

Me: What?

Partner: Sounds like the heater is still on.

Me: Go check it.

Partner leaves. Comes back.

Partner: Yeah, it was still on. I turned it off.

Flash forward now, if you will, and it is boiling. My partner has managed to remove his pants AND the covers from his body, but has still managed to go back to sleep. I have the curse of wake up with a much more active brain, so I’m confused as to why our bedroom has become a sauna. Perhaps global warming is upon us?

Me: Why is it so hot?

Partner: *gruffly* I dunno.

I get up from bed and leave to check the heater.

Partner: Are you coming back?

Me: Yeah.

He asks this because sometimes I can’t take his snoring, so I leave to sleep somewhere else. I am allowed to kick/prod him as much as I like (this he has said in a totally conscious, sound state of mind) but when you’ve been woken for the 6th time you know things aren’t going to get much better.

I can see the green light sticking out on the wall like a tiny ghost. I turn it off, looking again to make sure it is OFF, and walk back to the bedroom.

Me: The heater was on.

Partner: What?

Me: The heater was still on.

I opened the window and got a much needed chilly-breeze-slap in the face. I settle back into bed and listen to my partner say that it must be on some kind of timer. (I just think he didn’t hit the button hard enough.) We woke again to an alarm at 7:30.

Partner: Time to get up

I make some noises to demonstrate my annoyance.

Screw cheap market vegetables – I want to sleep! Thankfully, my partner was also tuckered out, so we went back to napping. I dreamt about a whole manner of different, exciting things.

©ArtfulAnxiety2012 – All Rights Reserved
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